Ever heard the saying: "Life will keep bringing you the same lesson, until you learn it."
I've recently been going through a healing process. Childhood Trauma and Attachments that I have been identifying with over the years to cope and protect myself. Or so I thought. Whether that be in connections with family members, friends, romantic partners, even people I have been connected to in professional situations.
My main attachment style that I used to have, is the anxious attachment style. (I say used to, because I've been working on and healing from this attachment style for a while now.) (Read my Anxious vs Avoidant Attachment Style Blog Post - Coming out soon.)
With me identifying as that attachment style, I used to unknowingly be co-dependent in relationships/connections. So, I constantly gave more than what I received. I gave to the point where I basically depleted myself. Emotionally, Physically and Financially. The core wound of any attachment style is the lack of self-love.
At this point I'm busy working through The Healing Process of what once did not serve me and as an affect did not serve those, I was connected to either. Elder Henry Pienaar once said to me that; "For Every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. - Isaac Newton"
Receiving Spiritual messages work through a 3-part process. Jay Shetty actually said that it is important to work on one part at a time. A friend of mine reminded me the other day of that. I was so focused on the hurt and the pain that I felt from working through something that I'm breaking and overcoming, that was a part of me for years. That I basically forgot that I'm human and have to allow myself to feel those emotions without judgment towards myself.
The 3-part process of healing:
1. The Soul - God give us messages via dreams, visions or direct sub-conscious thoughts etc.
On the 2nd of March 2023. I had a dream.
2. The Mind - The message gets revealed to you in the physical realm.
7 months later I received physical confirmation that the dream that I had came to pass.
3. The Emotional Body - You have to work through and heal the emotions that come up with whatever you have to overcome.
This is the most difficult part of the process. Some lessons are easy to deal with. Yet, others can really cut you to your core. This is why most people avoid this part of spiritual work. It's where you get to face yourself. At this point your soul is at peace, your mind is aware of what's happening. Yet your heart needs to grief whatever it attached itself to. This is also why many people remain in toxic situations. They fear dealing with the hurt that comes with letting something toxic go.
Dr Mate Gabor said it so well on his podcast with Jay Shetty. He said that Trauma is not what happened to you. Trauma is the wound that you sustained. That is good, because that means that the wound can be healed. Trauma is a wound that leaves an imprint. Healing literally means wholeness. Therefore, trauma disconnects us from our true self. Healing connects us.
My only desire in life right now is to have stability, peace and healthy balanced connections. With equal give and take.
I know I won't be able to achieve or manifest that if I don't let go of what does not produce those things. World leading therapist, Dr Lori Gottlieb said on her podcast with Jay Shetty that it's important to let go of connections that does not serve you and to allow other healthier connections to enter your life. Instead of trying to change that person, who clearly isn't compatible with you. Or remaining stuck in a situation where you wait for them to change. Rather, grief what you didn't get from that connection and go find it in someone who is willing to give it to you, without having to change them.
If you want something in your life, you've never had, you'll have to do something you've never done. - JD Houston
I leave with you the following Bible verse:
Then Jesus said to her, "Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering." - Mark 2:17
Good luck on your healing journey. God's love, grace and abundance surrounds you during this beautiful process of transformation, growth and evolution.
Written With So Much Love By: Nadine van Rayner
Follow Me For More Inspiration & Motivation On Instagram: @thoughts.of.a.woman1111
Here's To Learning, Growing & Evolving Together.
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